The Big Mac Challenge

I realize that this posting comes right after another posting having to do with my eating but I can't believe I haven't posted this sooner because this posting will probably amaze you,make you laugh, disgust you or all of the above. In my last post, I mentioned my voracious appetite. This posting will just confirm that.
So about 4 years ago, my employees and I are having lunch. Not sure how we got on this subject but one of my colleagues mentioned that she had never had a Big Mac. What? Who in the U.S. (probably the world now)has never had a Big Mac. I love 'em. Also, for a few years, I had been eating healthier and probably couldn't remember the last time I had a Big Mac. Well, one thing led to another and I said "I think I could eat 5 Big Macs in an hour" HUH!!! Everyone in the room was shocked at that statement, even knowing about my eating capabilities. Well, the Big Mac Challenge was on. About $100 was raised (Definately not close to enough money I should have gone for)and we set the ground rules.

1) Do it on a Friday, so if I get massively sick, it's the end of the week anyway
2) Must eat all 5 in 60 minutes and if any come back (aka throw up)within the 60 minutes, I lose

So the the about 2 weeks later the big day was here. The entire company was in the conference room. I was in jeans and a hooded sweatshirt( need to be comfortable for this kind of event)and ready with a couple of Cokes to wash down these babies.

My co-worker bought the Big Macs and we were ready to go.

I ate the 1st two Big Macs in about 3-4 minutes. Just pounded them(In the old days, 2 Big Macs would be what I would order in a normal McDonald's meal). Feeling good. Number 3 went down in another 7 minutes. Feeling full, no doubt, but feeling like this may not be as tough as I thought(NOT-as you will read later). I've got roughly 45 minutes to eat 2 Big Macs after I just polished off 3 of them in 15 minutes. No problem. Or so I thought.

I start to eat #4 and something came over me. Not sure if it was all the nitrates, grease or what but I didn't feel good at all. My stomach felt much more full than it did about 5 minutes ago. I kept going and it took me about 10-12 minutes to finish #4. At this point, I'm really not feeling good and thinking to myself"I really don't want to eat anymore" I'm looking at #5 and thinking "There isn't a chance I'm eating that" My wife ( who knows better than anyone how I eat) is on the speakerphone and she's saying "Stop being a wimp and eat that last one!" Love the support. I pick up #5 and bite into it. Oh Boy, this is not going to be easy. It takes 15 minutes to finish 2/3 of the Big Mac. At this point I tell my wife, "Do me a favor. When this is over, just promise me the kids don't call the new guy Dad" Other than having Mono and some bad days in college after drinking too many "beverages", this is the sickest I've ever felt in my life. I've got 5 minutes to eat 1/3 of a Big Mac and I'm getting ready to meet my maker. Well, somehow, I got the last of the 5th Big Mac down. Everyone cheered as I just sat there with my eyes closed thinking of how close I came to actually dying by overdosing on Big Macs. I went to my office, pulled the hood of my sweatshirt over my head and just sat there. For an hour. I finally felt a bit better. Believe it or not, I had dinner that night. I know, I'm not human.

So,there you have it.

5 Big Macs in 60 minutes=10 beef patties, 15 pieces of bun and a near death experience.

When I think back, the one thing that pops into my head is


I couldn't have said, "I could eat 4 Big Macs in an hour." I had to say 5!