Thursday, January 20, 2011

Did Everyone Go To The Bathroom?

I'm going to a speaking engagement in Orlando this weekend where I will be doing 3 sales seminars and I'm sitting on a panel for a discussion about client/vendor relationships. Well, this got me thinking about the last time I sat on a panel. It was 2008 at McCormick Place in Chicago. I was 1 of 4 panelists on a panel discussion that I can't even remember what the subject was. Being on panels and watching panel discussions, I have found the best moderators ask only a couple of the panelists to answers the questions. Meaning, you don't just go down the line and ask every panelist their views or answers. This will come in to play later in this post. I'm a blessed man in that at night I put my head on my pillow and in 5-7 minutes I'm out for the next 7-8 hours. This happens 360 out of 365 days a year. So back to the 2008 panel discussion. I had 3 hours of sales seminars at this event and then was ending as a panelist from 4:00-5:00 PM. Just my luck, the night before this marathon day was 1 of the 5 days a year I couldn't get to sleep. I'm exhausted. So I proceed to drink STARBUCKS Coffee all day. I was basically on a caffeine drip for 8 hours. To try to balance myself, I'm also drinking tons of water. If I wasn't speaking at one of my sales seminars, I was in the bathroom. So it's 4:00 and I just have this panel discussion for 1 hour. Being an idiot,( I thinks that's on my business card?)I don't go to the bathroom before the discussion. The 4 panelists are sitting on stage and I'm at the end of the stage, last seat. The moderator,who's really a nice guy, is doing exactly what I said earlier NOT to do. He's asking each panelist to answer each question. BRUTAL!!!!! It's now 4:30 and I have to go to the bathroom( What a shock after 4 Grande Starbuck coffees and 3 bottles of water). It's now 4:45 and I'm in more than a little bit of pain, wishing I had a pair of Depends Adult Diapers in my briefcase. The clock hit 4:55 and my eyes are rolling to back of my head and I'm thinking "I'm definately going to pass out" Someone in the audience asks a questions and of course the moderator goes down the line with me being last. He gets to me and says "Danny, what are you thoughts on this?" I reply "John, I have to go to the bathroom right now!" I jump off the stage and run out of the room like an Olympic Sprinter hearing the starter's gun. I get back, and the discussion is over.
Usually at this type of event this organization does a video interview for their website. As I'm walking up, one of the other panelist says "Hey, Piss Boy, you get to do the interview as punishment for running out on us!" I did the interview and when I got done all I could think of was what every parent says to their kids right before a long road trip. "Did everyone go to the bathroom?"

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