Tuesday, November 8, 2011

"Look Out For The ........!!!"

The year is 1979 and I'm a freshman in high school. Since freshman boys are at the bottom of the social food chain ( freshman girls are interested in older guys and older girls, well...forget about it) our socializing for the most part was just hanging out. This meant on a weekend night, we would roam the streets of our town(not old enough to drive) and probably end the night at the local 7-11 playing pinball and eating microwave burritos. What an exciting nightlife. Another thing we would do (mainly if part of the group were juvenile delinquents) would be yell at cars as they pass us to see if they would get mad enough to stop. If they happen to stop, we'd splinter off into smaller groups and run away through people backyards. I know, pathetic but hey, it was our entertainment. So this one night, there's about 12 of us(probably 3-4 guys that would fall under the category of juvenile delinquent) and we are roaming the streets doing nothing. Of course, any cars that drive past us, we yell obscenities and anything else we thought might get a rise out of them. We're walking down a pretty dark street when a car drives by us and continuing our moronic behavior, we give them some yells. ERRRRRHHH!!!!!  The car stops on a dime and we see about 5 older guys jump out!...HOLY #$!@!# !!!!!!  We all split up and take off.  I just happen to be running with the 2 largest guys in the group.  One guy happens to be the fullback on the freshman football team. He's huge but he can run really fast(faster than me) and the other guy was just a fat slow guy. It's pitch black out and we're running through backyards.  The big fast kid gets about 50 yards ahead of me and I'm about 50 yards ahead of the other big guy.  I can hear the guy way ahead of me yelling something but can't really make it out. All of sudden, I trip over what has to be fire wood and fall right on my face.  OUCHHH!!! I'm in some serious pain. I can still hear the guy way ahead of me yelling. All I can hear is "Look out for the ...ed!  Huh? Again, he yells from now what must be 100-150 yards away, "Look out for the ....ed!"  The next thing I hear is a huge THUD!!!...  The fat slow guy behind me has run into an immovable object and has just dropped like a bag of dirt...It sounded like he ran into a large aluminum garbage can. I look over and he's on the ground shaking the cobwebs out of his head.  The other guy ahead of us, walked back to see if we were alright knowing we weren't getting chased anymore. As I'm also trying to get my wits about my self, I look up and now know what that guy was yelling to us. LOOK OUT FOR THE SHED!  The guy behind me ran smack dab into a somebody's tool shed.. We all started to laugh and then the rest of the group found us. One of the guys standing there said, "You won't believe it, I tripped about 10 feet after we all took off and when I looked up, the guys had gotten into the car and drove off. They never even chased us." Once again, the big winner of the night was stupidity.

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